Love ends up with roommate

Dear Robert

Sorry to hear things aren't working out between you and this girl, the opposite sex can really be a headache to understand. If you're single and in the "dating scene" your bound to get burned now and again. Infatuation is an exciting thing, but it never quite guarantees success. Oddly I've found throughout my experiences in this female phenomenon, the more I thought it was going well, the more I was completely wrong. For the most part the best rule of thumb is be "cool", and let your intentions be known from the start. Although sending out the small signals feels less intimidating, it can sometimes be hard to interpret. Lets face it, people like to flirt, and as much as it's blatantly obvious this girl is flirting with you, she may not want anything to do with you in "that way".

I'm afraid I can't give you much advice in the respect of getting this girl "back" but merely a few wise words I've picked up along the way for the next infatuation. Once a girl labels you "a friend" it's very rare that they'll change their minds (lest there is a significant amount of time in between the meetings). Girls are complex, as is every person your ever going to meet. People don't know what's good for them, nor do they know what they really want, most people just run off instinct.

First of all don't put all your eggs in one basket, don't hang out with the same girl all the time. If you have a few girls you're interested in, you're not going to make yourself too available to just one and thus make yourself look more attractive. Girl's smell desperation like a shark smells blood, except they don't like it even half as much. If you have a few prospects vs. just one, you won't be as emotionally invested and so if it doesn't work out you probably won't be as devastated. If your looking for a relationship, one of these casual flirtations will work itself into something real when the times right, not forced.

I hate to say it but try not acting as interested in the people you like. Ever notice the jerks seem to have all the babes? It's true! By masking your undying "lust" for someone, you can turn the tables and have the have them do the chasing. Leaves more room for the hunt!

Finally and more importantly, add a touch of confidence to your game. Nothing's less attractive then a guy who is nervous and unsure of himself. It's time to build up your ego and let yourself feel good for the person you are. It doesn't matter what you look like, if you walk around like your worth a million dollars, your vibe will reflect that. Of course be wary, confidence and cockiness is a thin line, but keeping it at the right level will definitely help you out. If you think things are going well between you and a girl, get over your fear and make a move. What's the worse that could happen, they could push you away, big deal, you both smile and it's forgotten soon enough. Don't fall in love with a girl before you know she's yours, it will just lead to a lot of unneeded pain. Sometimes it can't be helped, but don't let them know you worship them, it rarely works.

Long story short, it's never going to be easy, but the more you try, the better chances of success. I suggest if your still in a rut over this girl, deal with it and work on getting back to a productive headspace. As they say " there are plenty of fish in the sea" and I'm sure you're capable of snagging your share of the catch. Seeing as though you are stuck living with your roommate you really only have two choices. To be bitter, or to accept this girl as a friend and that's it. Start hitting the gym, go out and meet new people, and I'm sure you'll find a girl that likes you for you.

I suppose this is all I can say on the topic... I hope this helps.

-Nate Lovestruck

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