The Casual "I love You" |
When does saying "I love you" get to be so casual. It
seems we say it more out of habit then because we truly want to tell
each other that we do. Oddly if it isn't said we end up thinking
something is wrong. I've gotten to the point where I'm thinking if I
don't say it to her everyday, will she still believe I love her? She
says she wants to hear me tell her that I love her everyday, but it
sounds so casual now. If she doesn't tell me that she loves me I usually
suspect something's wrong too. By the way this is a long distance
relationship. What do you think?
Natalie |
| Answer: |
Dear Natalie
It's funny that you mentioned that, I've often thought about this
myself. The first time it was said it seemed to have so much meaning
and emotion, but as the days went on it seems to become more of the
norm. It always amazed me on how unimportant it seemed at times and
yet if it wasn't said, suddenly it was missed and insecurities would
arise. I believe this concept is generally derived from the seeking
of validation that everything is going smoothly. Especially in long
distance relationships where you can't read body language, hearing
the simple words "I love you" at the end of the conversation
generally confirms that the other person is still happy with the
relationship. As silly as it may seem to constantly reinforce this
idea that the love is still there, I think it's a beautiful
tradition to upkeep. You hear it everyday and you take it for
granted, but when it isn't said you really miss it. A verbal hug, so
to speak.
Wishing you the best with your relationship
-Nate Lovestruck
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